Yes You, Fat Jesus!
"It's hard to bet against Jesus," said Pastor Richard Bryant of Ocracoke United Methodist Church, who was witnessing his first of six WOVV Women's Arm Wrestling Tournaments. I guess he would know.
Fat Jesus handily beat The Baker in the final round of the double-elimanation tournament. Her winnings include a great photo opportunity, a year's worth of bragging rights, and very temporary custody of the WOVV championship belt. Proceeds from the competition benefit Ocracoke's own community radio station, on the air at 90.1FM or heard around the world at wovv.org.
This wasn't Fat Jesus's first rodeo. She's been around this block a couple of times before, wrasslin' her way to the Final Four in 2013 and 2014. Third time's a charm.
Fat Jesus is called Melissa Owsley back home in the Buckeye State. "I was wearing this t-shirt the first time at the tournament in the Community Square, and they gave me this nickname and it stuck," she said, referring to the Hangover-inspired, "Not You, Fat Jesus" Zach Gallifinakis shirt. "I love the arm wrestling," she said. "I have the most fun doing it." She "absolutely" planned her vacation from Rittman, Ohio around the event this year.
Thirteen other women came out to wrestle this year: Dorothy the Dominator, Salvador Dalia and the Persistence of Mammaries, Shark Attack, Demolition Dolly, Hair of the Dog, So Fresh and Clean, Soelle, Crystal River Bone Crusher, The Baker, Danger Ranger, Armed and Dangerous Archer, Wild Card, and Banana Slug.
The Baker took second place. Her alias is Lauren Strohl, proprietor of Graceful Bakery. She's proof that kneading bread is a strength-training exercise. The Baker was a crowd favorite, and not just because she brought along a basket of goodies to share. I got a macaroon!
Third place went to Salvador Dalia – again. Last year, as Damage Patch Kid, she reached the same ranking.
Armed and Dangerous, A.K.A. Jessica Archer, was back for her second competition. She was the Runner-Up (losing only to Karm the Arm) in the original tournament at sMacNally's on June 15, 2010 – the same day that WOVV broadcast over the airwaves for the first time. Armed and Dangerous was happy that her Aunt Nancy wrestled this year, too. Nancy Archer Russell was, at age sixty, the matriarch of the contest, older by decades than most of her opponents.
Costumes kudos this year went to So Fresh (3rd place), Shark Attack (2nd place), and Salvador Dalia (1st place). Congrats, Sal, for another well-deserved prize! (Damage patch Kid took 1st place in 2014! Katy's in it to win it!)
Sean and Laurie Death hosted the tournament at the Beachcomber Campground (behind the gas station), Bill Cole provided the commentary and announcements, and Tommy and Kathy Hutcherson deejayed with tunes and special effects.
Giles Russell officiated the event for the 4th year. Most recently, Giles won the 2014 Virginia State 220-lb. Right Hand arm wrestling title. He's a pro and he's got the biceps to prove it! He wrestles all comers between the rounds of females, but nobody ever beats him. Until this year. Six year-old Olivia took him down.
"She told me she was going to wrestle me and win," Giles said. Did we mention that Olivia is his daughter? Giles also brought his son, Aaron, who wrestled (and beat) younger members of the audience.
Per tradition, Giles took on the champion after the tournament. "I wanted to make her arm burn a little bit, so she had a workout," he said.
